Unhealthy relationships are reflections of our own relationships with ourselves.
It's an inside job and our responsibility to uncover those aspects within that are to be addressed and transmuted. These undiscovered places in our hearts are beckoning us to bring them to light. When we choose to ignore them because of fear regarding the potential of what we may discover we end up suppressing them, which not only causes us harm but can come out in other ways, such as self-sabotage or even passive aggressiveness which is unresolved or unaddressed anger. This anger is an indicator for us to look inward to see what we are and aren't doing that us honoring to us. Sometimes, if on some level we choose to, if we even suppress this anger we become depressed. We spend much time and energy avoiding ourselves and this alone can cause us to feel tired more often. The body can only hold the weight of so much before it can't any longer and produces symptoms. The body communicates to us in symptoms when we are out of balance. Similarly, the lack of or reduction of symptoms is an indicator of being more in a direct relationship with ourselves and how we choose to listen, sometimes. It's a tedious process at times and this is why many people choose to not adventure here. Though, so often I hear of people complaining about wanting things to be better but when push comes to shove they'd rather play victim than victor. I played victim for a short time and realized that it didn't get me anything more than what I was already suffering from. It's still a process but the momentum I've created takes over and keeps it moving at this point. A worthy investment is say.
We are to find enJOYment in joy. Joy is from the heart and in the heart we do the "work" to unearth whatever is being harbored that is rooted in wounds to be healed through awareness, acceptance, forgiveness and releasing them. If we aren't feeling joy from any relationship, be it with intimate partners, friends, family, children or co-workers it is up to us to be clear in where we are at. What we are putting out there. What we are doing to honor ourselves and where we are willing to extend boundaries as needed. Self-preservation is needed. It starts with us first and the choices we make depends on how willing we are to see what we deserve for ourselves and are willing to accept for ourselves. Love doesn't ask us to lose ourselves but only those aspects of ourselves that prevent us from fully being in and with love. If anything, love wants us to show up fully and present with both feet. We deserve it but we have to truly know it and feel it for ourselves. On a deeper level this truth is available to all of us. Yet, are we willing to take a step back and peek back a veil or two, of our own making, to see it and then align ourselves with what we say we want? This deeper yearning trickles out from time to time as a reminder of our potential. We all deserve happiness and know in a deeper level that it's our divine right. Can we show up for ourselves as need be? Or do we choose to look the other way? Do we settle for anything less than we deserve or do we step up and take the leap by letting go of what's not matching us, to accept what does?
Love always returns to love and truth always comes back to itself. Truth itself is the blazing blade of white fire purity that casts light on the darkness. I choose to show up for myself each day. Some days more and better than others but I'm always willing to look at my shadow pieces to see what they are drawing my attention towards so that I can continue to transform what doesn't serve me. What do you choose?